Disability Medical Reasons != Medical Reasons?

PM From ***: hey hey question!!!!!! I just saw your newest pics earlier XD is that you in the wheelchair?
PM Sent To ***: "Yup."
PM From ***: Lol. I didnt know you use a wheelchair lol
PM Sent To ***: "Well, I do. :P"
PM From ***: Lol. How come?
PM Sent To ***: "Because they're totally awesome. All the cool kids do it. ;)"
PM Sent To ***: "*cough* I mean uhh, here, have a link: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ehlers-Danl os_syndrome"
PM Sent To ***: "(minus the space that TLR chat adds)"
PM From ***: Lol. All you had to say was that its medical reasons why =P
PM Sent To ***: "...Well, who the hell uses one for non-medical reasons? And what the hell ARE those reasons?"
PM From ***: Lol. I meant like disability medical reasons LOL. Ive used one cause I couldnt walk fast enough cause of my surgery LOL.
PM Sent To ***: "That's...still a medical reason."
PM From ***: XD haha. But i def didnt know lol. its cool actually lol

Uhhh...I really don't know how to feel about this conversation. At all.

EDIT: after an attempt at explaining:

PM From ***: Awwwws. Lol. Leasnt your not depressed over it (as far as I can tell) lol

Aaand another gem:

PM From ***: Hahahaha. if you like sports you shuld enter the special olympics XD

That last one would be a lot more forgiveable if I had ever once said to her that I liked sports, or even implied it. Or talked about them at all.

PM Sent To ***: "I've never liked sports. >.>"
PM From ***: LOL Okay then HAHA
PM From ***: Lol. Least your not depressed =P thats all that counts XD haha

...I give up.

Well, She Doesn't Usually, But Then She Doesn't Usually Get Poked In The Face Either

Little kid: Is that your dog?
Me: Yes
Kid: Does it bite?
Me: No, she'll only playbite if you're wrestling with her.
Kid: *proceeds to poke Moxie in the face with a stick*
Moxie: *runs away scared*
Me: Please don't do that. She's only a baby and she's scared.
Kid: *chases, still trying to poke stick in her eyes*
Moxie: Grrrrr
Kid: *continues poking her in the face*
Me: Could you please stop that? She doesn't like it!
Kid: *pokes her in the face*
Moxie: *bites, but not hard*
Kid: YOU SAID SHE WOULDN'T BITE! *runs away crying*
Me: ...

I Think I Preferred The Sales Calls

So, there's a knock on the door, and I'm home alone so I have to get up to answer it despite feeling very faint and not very steady on my feet (and still being in my pyjamas). I'm not best pleased about this but figure 'hey, it could be a parcel!' (I get all excited about them)

Guy at door: *speaking very quickly* Hello! I'm with the British Red Cross!
Me: *tries to get a word in edgeways to say that I have no money to give them* I'm sorry, I-
Guy: *still speaking quickly* Don't worry! We're not after your money! I just wanted to tell you about the vital work that we do around here! You're probably not aware of this but did you know that within a three-mile radius of your home there are roughly twenty sick or disabled people who need our help?!
Me: *finding it very difficult to stay standing* Actually, I-
Guy: We're on constant alert for these people in case they fall or faint or have strokes or accidents in their home!
Me: *worried I'm about to faint, finding it very difficult to concentrate on what he's saying* ...
Guy: *carries on ranting about disabled people to me* (lack of comprehension prevents me from telling you what he was saying here)
Me: *tries to get another word in edgeways* Excu-
Guy: *talks over me*
Me: ... *gives up and leans against wall to try and keep balance and consciousness*
Guy: *finally finishes rant* So, have you been out at work today or are you just having a leisurely day off?
Me: Actually, I don't work, as I'm disabled myself, and I *really* quite badly need to go sit down now. *stumbles back a few steps to collapse on the wheelchair behind me*
Guy: ...
Me: ... *too busy waiting for get my head to settle down and my blood pressure to normalise to talk*
Guy: Uhh, I'm very sorry. *walks off*

Sometimes Sales Calls Amuse Me

Salesperson: Hi this is **** from 3 the phone company. Can I just ask if you're on pay as you go or contract?
Me: Neither. I don't have a mobile.
Salesperson: ... *looking through script*
Me: ...
Salesperson: Uhhh...Uhmmm... *panicking as this response isn't in there*
Me: ...
Salesperson: ...Does anyone else in your house have one?
Me: No! *lying*
Salesperson: Oh, well, thank you very much for your time! *hangs up*

I ran out of words

...but it's okay, because Rambo understands me anyway.

Me: Sugar?
Rambo: What?
Me: Su...gar? *holds out mug*
Rambo: Okay, I'll go put the kettle on. *takes mug*
Me: Sugah!
Rambo: Do you need me to put some words in this?
Me: Sugar? *headtilt*
Rambo: You want words in your tea, or are you just low on blood sugar?
Me: Sugarrrrr.
Rambo: Well, you seem to be down to your last word, so I'll put some words in this.
Me: Sugah! *smiles*
Rambo: (to Moxie) Do you have any words for your Mommy?
Moxie: *shakes self*
Rambo: So that's a no, then?
Me: NO! SUGAH!
Rambo: *laughs, and goes off to make tea*