...What?

I was just at the park with Moxie. She was running around playing, as puppies do, enjoying herself immensely, and I was sitting on the bench with a book. Now, this is primarily a dog park and is always full of dogs running around playing - so you don't go in this park and expect to not deal with any dogs coming to say hello, and therefore I always get annoyed when people complain about it.

Anyway, this woman enters the park with her (I'd guess about five year old) son. Walks past me up the path and Moxie runs over to say hello, as she does to everyone, as most dogs do in this park to everyone. Doesn't bark or growl or jump up or anything, just runs over to them, crouches down in playful puppy position, then runs off again back to me. Little kid gets scared and moves towards his mother for protection. Mother, rather than comforting her child and reassuring him that everything's alright and it's just a puppy and not going to hurt him, turns around and shouts at me, "If that things comes near me again I'm gonna boot it in the face, keep your fucking dog on a lead!"

I could only stare at her in shock. Then brought Moxie home as I was quite scared for her safety.

It's Called CHOOSE and BOOK - I Did Neither!

You remember that Choose & Book letter that was in no way a choice? They said my selected clinic would call to arrange an appointment.

A few days ago I got a letter saying 'We apologise that there were no appointments available when you called to arrange one' - I did no such thing - 'we will be in touch to arrange one for you.' Pretty pissed at that, still don't actually want to go to this particular clinic. Would like an actual choice.

Then today, I got a letter confirming the appointment that I supposedly arranged with them, for next Friday.

Again, I arranged no appointment with them. I have not been in any kind of contact with them. I do not want to go to this clinic.

WTF

Moxie's not quite house-trained yet. This is partly due to me not always being able to jump up and take her to the newspaper/outside when she needs me to and partly due to Rambo just watching her when she wees on the floor and going 'Ohhhhh Moxiiiieee...' but not actually doing anything about it so she thinks he's condoning it. And then not cleaning it up so the whole fucking house smells like a toilet to her.

I'm doing the best I can, when I'm able to, and cleaning things up when I see them, but I can't do it alone and I need his help. But every time I tell him that he goes 'Help? HELP?! You want me to do it all myself! That's not me helping, that's me doing it and you helping!' Because apparently he's incapable of seeing that I do things.

Anyhow, she's getting there slowly. She mostly goes on the newspaper and she won't go on carpet or furniture at all - just the kitchen and living floors that are easy to clean. She just gets confused about the rest of it. She's only three months old, I've known dogs take far longer to be house-trained, but it's pissing Rambo off.

So about last night...I had a dislocated ankle, was laid up on the sofa unable to move, and the house was pretty quiet. I worry about it being quiet when she's not in sight as it usually means she's found something out of sight to chew, so I call her. She doesn't respond. Rambo refuses to move because he's busy playing computer games*. Hour and a half later I get my ankle to stay in place long enough for me to hobble upstairs to bed, Rambo comes with me. We open the bedroom door to find a poor little puppy who managed to trap herself in there, tail wagging like mad as she's so happy to be free and have her people back. Problem is, as she's been stuck in there for an hour and a half, she's pood on the carpet. Not something she'd normally do and she was stuck for God's sake, but Rambo sees that, flips out screaming 'FUCKING DOG' at her and then KICKS her. With shoes on.

She yelps and runs to her mommy for protection, I scream at him, comfort her, and start crying. He cleans it up and storms off. Me and Moxie go to bed and I lock the bedroom door because people who kick puppies don't get to sleep in the bed with me.

...I then cry for hours, thinking about things. Rambo's always had a nasty temper and it's scary enough when he's just kicking doors and punching computer monitors and walls, but to kick the PUPPY? It's noon the next day and he's still not said a word of apology or to even acknowledge that what he did was wrong. I'm...not sure I can live with that. You don't kick dogs. You especially don't kick defenceless little puppies. What the FUCK was he thinking?

This is the first time I've actually seriously considered leaving him, and it scared the fuck out of me because there is no way I could take care of myself, let alone Moxie. I did it for that one week but I struggled so fucking much and I was only able to cope because I knew he was coming back and I could just ignore most things and leave it for him to fix afterwards. I can't go live with my Dad as there's no room. I don't really want to go live with anyone else as I'm pretty sure nobody else knows just how bad I am these days and they won't know what they're getting themselves into and I don't want to be a burden.

EDIT: He apologised, and promised to never ever ever do it again. He's not so great at keeping promises though, and if he breaks this one I don't think he's going to get another chance.






*Don't get me fucking started on that. He keeps starting up instances when he's in the middle of something like cooking dinner and then getting pissed off at me when an hour later I go '...weren't you cooking dinner? Shouldn't you check on that?' and shouts at me that he's busy, so I go check on the charcoal instead, get pissed off and make my own food. Now, I don't mind making my own food, but when he's cooking I figure I don't have to, and when he's cooking he usually makes the food that I can't which means I can't really take over halfway through when he decides an instance run would be more fun.