Christmas

Yay Christmas:
I love Christmas. Seriously, I'm like a little kid. I get sooo freaking excited counting down the days and hours and minutes until Christmas, and on Christmas Eve I was curled up in bed in my new pyjamas (family tradition, new pyjamas on Christmas Eve) before midnight because midnight is when Santa comes and he wouldn't come if I was asleep. Then I woke up at eight in the morning all bouncy and excited and woke Rambo up shouting 'MERRY CHRISTMAAS' at him until he got up to open stockings with me. Then I had to literally drag him round to my dad's house whilst he was still half-asleep and insisting that Christmas doesn't start until noon (SO wrong). But my little baby cousins are visiting from Spain so everyone around there was also woken up early by excited children and everyone was happy and excited and shouting MERRY CHRISTMAS over and over while we started on the drinking and drugs super-early in the day and handed out presents.

I love my family. My Dad's side of it, anyhow. Other people are always telling me how much Christmas sucks because they have to get all the family together and there's lots of tension and arguments and stress about the whole thing. Screw all of that. We have the happiest Christmases ever. Christmas is MAGICAL in my family. I LOVE CHRISTMAS. I'm actually depressed that I have to wait a whole 'nother year until next Christmas. I want to do it all again NOW.

Except I can't, really. Christmas is a spoon-sucker. I do the whole thing fueled entirely by my child-like wonder and excitement of Christmas and shove everything else aside for the day so I can be happy, and then I crash pretty hard on boxing day and I've been in bed since early yesterday evening and don't plan on moving until tomorrow.

Oh well. So freaking worth it. :)

Awesome things I got:

My sister knitted me some purple armwarmers. Just the right size to hide my tubigrips. I LOVE them. I know it's only been two days, but I've not had a single 'what did you do to your wrist?'/'OMG what happened?' comment in those two days. Loving it.

80k got me a moonkin hatchling on WoW. She is so cutes. Extra-cutes with mommy boomkin and baby boomkin flapping her wings trying to fly. <3

Rambo tells me there are books in the mail. I'm counting that as an awesome thing even though they're not here yet because otherwise this list is depressingly short.

Depressing things I shoved to the side for the day but kept attempting to intrude on my Christmas-happiness anyhow:

Rambo's aunt was diagnosed with breast cancer a few weeks ago, it's spread to her bones and she's starting chemo on Thursday. He's pretty upset about it. I don't know her all that well but I'm suddenly feeling a spoonie-bond towards her that I'm not really sure I can act on as his family doesn't really understand my spoonieness and would just be offended that I would try and compare what I have with cancer. Which isn't what I want to do at all, I just...I can relate to her, is all. And I want to put some kind of spoonie-care-package together. I'm just really not sure how his family will take that. They're already pretty judgemental of me. But it's not about me, it's about making her feel better, so I should just suck it up. Right. I'll get right on that.

Friend of mine left her husband on Christmas Eve as he was gambling and drinking etc and she confronted him about it and he tried to blame it all on her. Said that caring for a disabled person made him do it. Fucker. She deserves so much better than that. But she can't care for herself and what a horrible time to be alone and I'm so mad at him and so upset that I can't help her, even though she's not that far away, because I can't care for MYSELF let alone anyone else and I couldn't possibly ask Rambo to do that for me. I just hope her Christmas wasn't as horribly depressing as I'm imagining.

Whining:

Dad's side of the family is awesome. My Dad himself is awesome. His choice in girlfriends not-so. She's one of those people who obviously doesn't like you and is quite judgemental of you, but won't ever say anything to your face. I hate that. I just get nasty looks from her constantly, and then my sister telling me later on what she's been saying about me behind my back. Ugh. She's also one of those people who thinks that looks and clothes and make-up are everything. And spends ridiculous amounts of money on those things, then whines when she can't afford bills. Anyway, the whining here is the fact that she's in charge of the Christmas shopping for her and my Dad, so he doesn't really get a say in it. So my presents from the both of them consisted of make-up (not even make-up that I might occasionally wear, like eyeliner or mascara, but lipstick which I absolutely abhorr), a PINK coat (seriously. Pink. Wtf?), a stack of pretty notebooks which are sort of an okay present in that she's put slightly more thought into it than the others and realised that I like to write, but is just depressing because I can't physically write with pen and paper, my wrists haven't been up to that for years, and insulting because she KNOWS that, but she thinks I'm faking. Oh, and some ten year old video games that I already have. Woo. She also got Rambo some xbox live points. He doesn't have xbox live.

I hate to whine about presents, because it's the thought that counts, not what you actually get, but she's so obviously not put any thought into them and it pisses me off because I put so much thought into hers and got her awesome things that she loves and has been playing with pretty much since she opened them. I also talked to other people about presents to make sure I wasn't duplicating anything, like those old games. Also pisses me off that for the last few months she (along with other people) have been shouting at me not to buy myself anything because Christmas is coming up and I should just put it on my wishlist so that it can be bought for me. I made a wishlist and the only thing that got bought off it was for my Dad because he saw one of the games on my list and went 'oh that looks cool'. Great. I wasn't expecting anything big or expensive or anything. I put tons of little cheap things on there that people could buy me and that I would have been really happy with. Things that I needed, like a new laptop mouse because mine broke. And they were all so fucking insistent that I couldn't buy myself a new one, so I waited a month without, with the touchpad driving me crazy, and now I have to go buy my own anyway.